One of the great things about moving countries is discovering new sports to get mad about. For me, my greatest discovery since moving to Switzerland is Lutte. Or Swiss Wrestling.

It’s a very simple idea in that you want to pin your opponent’s back to the ground. But the execution is of course much more difficult and requires not only strength, but balance and skill. So excited am I about it, my wife has bought me a traditional blue ‘lutte’ shirt complete with edelweiss!

For those unfamiliar with lutte, here is a short video that will give you a better idea of why I am such a fan. Of course, being a fan of lutte means plenty of beer and wine drinking, so it really fits my lifestyle rather well.


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There is nothing more gladiatorial, physical and brutal and at the same time gentlemanly and enriched by fair play as rugby. Watching huge unshaven, battle scared brutes clashing bodily and testing their ability to play with skill and fairness while being subject to the pressure of extreme physical duress is something to admire.

While crushed under the weight of six bodies of 120 kilos, pinned by one arm and head, a good forward knows what to do. Get his body over the ball and force it back to his half, waiting to pass swiftly from his pain and suffering. Or the hooker. Jammed between two brutes and forced head first into the scrum with 800 kilos of grunt forcing him into the head of his opposite number, while concentrating on getting the ball with his feet.

Then the hooker needs to recover his strength for a line out. Where he must throw the ball with millimetre accuracy into the air to time with his giant 2 metre number seven who is launched into the air by two grunting forwards.

The back line get it relatively easy. Little light weights by comparison who can run with speed and agility. Unless they are waiting under the ball kicked into the air and knowing they must catch it cleanly. And also knowing that a split second later they will be hit with the full force of a rampaging 120 kilo forward whose intention is a crunching tackle using all his body mass at full speed.

At the end of a match, bloodied, bruised, crushed, twisted and exhausted, they all get wearily to their feet and shake their opponents hands after the blood and battle. For eighty minutes, not a one takes a backward step. However, after the match they are all on the same side. Because they are gentlemen, those who play rugby.

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For those of you not born into the religion of cricket, which I imagine may be most of you, I would like to take a moment to introduce you to my passion. Cricket.

Now for a start, you need to understand that a single game of international test cricket takes five full days of 6 hours each to complete. That’s right, thirty hours! Then at the end there can be a winner and loser, but very often just a shake of hands and the game is declared a draw. And a series is normally five matches. Yes, good work. 25 days! Are you still awake?

It takes this long because it is necessary to take all ten wickets of the opposing team, twice, before you can win. Oh, and of course you need more runs than your opposition, but this is really a bit secondary to taking the twenty wickets. In between all this, there are breaks for lunch of course, and a wonderful little break in the afternoon called tea. What other game stops for tea? English breakfast is a favourite.

The bowling team of eleven plays against the batting team. There are two batsmen at a time, so that is eleven against two. Not counting the umpires. There is always a debate about which team they are on. Then when ten wickets have been taken they swap around. So far pretty easy.

The bowler either tries to get the batsman out, or stop him from scoring. If he does stop the batsman from scoring, he bowls a maiden over. (I know. It’s a beautiful expression.) Then the batsman can use a number of shots to score. Pulls, hooks, slices, dabs, drives, slogs and cuts. Nice words too.

A batsman can be out so many different ways it is staggering how they survive. Caught, bowled, leg before wicket, stumped, run out, hit wicket, obstruction or handled ball. Oh forgot timed out. The bowler has different balls too. Cutters, seamers, swingers, bouncers and yorkers. I have a feeling this might be like learning Latin to some readers.

The game is played on a huge oval of green grass about 200 meters (yards for US) in diameter. Some bigger in fact. And the batsmen and bowlers use a 22 yard pitch made of clay and grass, ( yes it’s hard) to play on. The red leather ball weighs in at 5 1/2 ounces and is as hard as a rock. Balls are bowled at close to 100 mph. If you do a little calculating here, 20 odd yards with a ball coming at your head at 100 mph, it doesn’t give you much time to get your head out of the road of the ball. I know. Been there done that. Explains a lot about my mental agility nowadays.

There are a number of other formats of the game ranging down from 5 days to 4 days to 3 days to 1 day and to 3 and half hours. Don’t know why there isn’t a 2 day game.

So there you have it. In a nutshell then.

11 go out to get 10 out. Then the other 11 go out to get the other 10 out. Then they do it all over again. And if one of the 11 manage to get the other 10 twice, they win. But if they don’t, it’s a draw. Simple really.

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